Thought Series : Raising a HAPPIE Toddler
This week, we’re focusing on the most basic and fundamental human need : Health / Physical well-being.
We’ve already established why we’re focusing on Self-Love and Self-Care first, before we deep-dive into loving & caring for our toddler’s needs. It’s because – it is impossible to give our BEST to our child, when we are feeling our WORST.
Sacrificing your own needs, in little things, on a daily basis – knowingly or unknowingly builds up frustration within you. As your own unmet needs begin to pile up, you drown deeper into your own misery – and how can you help your child with his/her needs from a deep pit?
And so, I really want you and me to first cater to our own self so that we can tend to our dear child, in our best capacity. It’s like the announcement made before every flight –
During an emergency, make sure you wear your own oxygen mask FIRST, before you help your child with his.
Today, we’ll learn how we can make self-love & self-care a sustainable habit. It does not have to be something elaborate. Just a tiny little habit or a bunch of tiny habits throughout the day, to help you function at your optimum – for your child.
(A side note: This time, last year – I had published a course on ‘How to make/break habits’ based on my learnings from the classics – The Habit Loop by Charles Duhigg, Atomic Habits by James Clear and B J Fogg’s work on Tiny Habits. Here below, I’m trying to put all of it in the smallest nutshell possible!)
So, here’s how we do it: Establishing a Self-Love/Care Habit
Step 1: Choose a tiny self-care action that can be done in less than 15 mins.
Example: For my physical well-being, I want to take my vitamins daily.
Step 2: Choose a time – before / after an already established habit or routine.
Example: After breakfast, I will take my vitamins.
Step 3: Reward yourself – Put a tick on the calendar, earn a streak of 3 days and treat yourself & your child to an ice-cream – anything small to help you stick with the routine & make it a habit.
Now, the secret : If you do this chose self-care action everyday – for 3 days in a row, then 7 days, then 10 days – till the end of 10 weeks – you have a NEW HABIT in place, and you will no longer have to put any effort into doing it. It becomes automatic!
Let’s take a few more examples:
- For my physical well-being, after I wake up – I’ll exercise for at least 15 minutes.
- For my mental well-being, after my daughter naps – I’ll spend at least 15 mins reading.
- For my emotional well-being, before lunch – I’ll spend at least 15 minutes with my
Hope you’ve got the flow: The KEY to successfully building a habit – is to be as SPECIFIC as possible, and to keep the habit as TINY as possible, and to do it DAILY till the end of 10 weeks.
THOUGHT for TODAY
Create and share your own Self-Care/Love Promise using this template:
For my ___________ (physical/mental/emotional) well-being,
before/after ____________(an established routine),
I will _________________ (new habit)
Put it up on the mirror, as a daily reminder – Along with this quote:
When I became a Mom, I did not stop being ‘human’ – my well-being is important for my child’s well-being. So, just like always – I’ll do this for ______ (your child’s name).
I’ll remind you about your self-love promise at least for the next 7 days.
We’ll deep-dive into the different aspects of your child’s physical well-being & health.
Access Previous Days In This Series: Raising a HAPPIE Toddler