Thought Series : Raising a HAPPIE Toddler
This week, we begin our focus on the next need in line – to raise a HAPPIE Toddler – and that’s the need for Attention / Connection.
Now, though I used both the words synonymously, I’d like to begin with dissecting how different these words are and what they mean for your toddler.
Going simply by the dictionary definition of both:
* notice taken of someone or something;
* the regarding of someone or something as interesting or important.
* the action of dealing with or taking special care of someone or something.
* a relationship in which a person or thing is linked or associated with something/someone else.
* a relation of personal intimacy (as of family ties)
Well, it seems like I can just stop here! It’s so clear, isn’t it!?
Attention is something that anybody can offer, it’s about taking notice of something as important, and taking the necessary action. The need for attention can be fulfilled quickly, with little effort.
But, Connection – is much deeper, and it marks and arises out of the intimate relationship you share with the person, and it’s not something that can happen overnight or in an instant.
A simpler analogy to understand connection would be the idea of ‘soulmates’. We’ve all dreamed of finding our ‘soulmate’ and marrying that person, haven’t we? Someone who could understand us, even when we said nothing! Someone who could see through our eyes, into our hearts and know what we wanted. Haven’t we craved for that kind of connection!? Well, been there.. done that!
What I realized (as I grew older and wiser) was that – there’s no one who’s born as my soulmate, but I can become someone’s soulmate (and vice versa) by trying each day, to understand, to be and to do the best I can!
What if, each day, we work towards becoming our child’s soulmate, and understanding his/her said and unsaid needs!
Our toddlers (and humans, in general) crave for connection. Seeking attention is just one of the ways in which they’re communicating their deeper need for connection.
For today, I’d just like you to mull over this.
Thought for Today
On a scale of 1 to 10 (One being the minimum) –
How would you rate the attention you are giving your child every day?
How would you rate the connection you feel with your child every day?
We’ll begin looking at ‘connection rituals’ you can establish in your day in short spurts of time.
Access Previous Days In This Series: Raising a HAPPIE Toddler
Day 0 : Laying out Universal Human Needs
Day 1 : Healthy Parent = HAPPIE Child
Day 2 : Making Self-Care A Habit
Day 3 : Meeting your toddler’s physical needs
Day 4: Identifying your own triggers before you tend to your child’s
Day 5: Dealing with feelings of guilt & inadequacy (Moms!)